The smell detector

I wish wish wish there were something such as a smell detector. I wish there was a smell detector located at the door of every public transport so that whenever smelly people get on the bus/train, the smell detector will emit a shrill alarm screaming "GET OFF GET OFF YOU SMELLY FUCKFACE!!!"

Of course that will not happen.

I searched in trusted wiki and there are no results so i assumed there is no such thing invented yet. Mayb there is only it wasen't use on something so trivial as public transport.

The thing is, smelly people should not take public transport! In my case, the bus. I take the bus to work every morning and when a smelly person sat beside me, it ruined my perfectly fine morning.

Few days ago i missed my bus so i called a cab to the bus station, reached, found my bus which is exactly the same bus which i would have taken if i were to have a lil bit of patience and wait in my usual spot. I sat down, opened my novel and prepare to lost myself in it. Alas, that wasn't the end of my unfortunate monday morning.

As fate would have it, an a nehneh/ bengala (not sure, so i shall call him IT ) DECIDED TO SIT BESIDE ME. OH MY DEAR GOODNESS, HE SMELLS LIKE... LIKE... (loss of adjective to describe the smell!! it is too smelly!!!!). He is the most repulsive smelling person i have ever encounter and the waff of vile smell coming from his body almost suffocated me. I was reluctant to move as the bus is full and i will have to stand until i reach my workplace, which is eons away.

Thus i coughed loudly and cover my nose, sqeeze myself as far away from him as possible, and turn my head completely away from him. I CAN STILL SMELL HIM. Pondering over wheather to sit here and assault my nose or stand in aisle and sway around and let my toes be stepped on, i choose the previous.

Bad came to worse. The "IT" FELL ASLEEP AND HIS HEAD IS TILTING TOWARDS ME.
The smell become almost unbearable and i am getting desperate. The final straw came when HIS HEAD DROP TO MY SHOULDER. AAAARRRRGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! I AM CONTAMINATED!!!!

The "IT" being jolted awake from his slumber look at me innocently when i stand up abruptly and said excuse me (polite), get out from my seat and stand in the aisle away from him. I felt a stab of guilt as I think i'm being mean. But his smell is really really unbearably smelly.

I was standing on the aisle and muling over a problem. When people see an old/pregnant/handicapped person they would give up their seat for them right? It has been drilled into us since young that this is the morale we should have.

There is one problem though, what if you think the person looks old but is not sure?? How to deemed the person old enough to give her your seat??? mayb she's a healthy 40+ yr old lady but looks way older than she should, like 60, then when you give her your seat she will look at you with a massive frown, then proceed to yell "YOU SIAO AH??!!! WHY YOU GIVE ME YOUR SEAT??!! I LOOK VERY OLD MEH?? FUCKK YOU LA!!! then continue to mumble something under her breath about youngsters nowaday.

HOW?

I have this dilemma everytime i see quite old but not very old person standing. -.-"